One of the most amazing things, and something I didn’t expect, is the amount of people joining in with #1stdraftdiary. Although I’ve been finding my own journey this time around to be disjointed and frustrating, I’m loving the response it’s getting from others. From people thanking me for being honest about the process and making them feel better, to lots of writers joining in to kick start their own work or understand their own process, it’s been phenomenal. And so, if you head to #1stdraftdiary on twitter and click on the Live tab, you can see what everyone is up to and offer your support. And if you’re writing a first draft, why not join in? In the meantime, here are my #1stdraftdiary days 15 to 21.

#1stdraftdiary Day 15 (June 25^th): although I prefer to write first, it’s not always possible, especially when you have a number of freelance clients waiting for work or a garden that needs rescuing. I manage 2000K words of freelance, some intense weeding of the vegetable patch and herb garden (before everything dies), a dog walk, and some article pitches sent before I can sit down to write. I see it as creating an air of calm for writing; I can’t write when I have lots of things hanging over me. Despite starting late, I get my word count up to 29,400 in a very short space of time and eventually hit the 30K target. Can’t extol the virtues of switching off internet enough! Word count: 30,000

#1stdraftdiary Day 16: I was going to take a day off writing to clear some freelance work but the words are calling. I manage 300 words in a cheeky 20 minute stint and eventually finish the day at 31,500, as well as 2000K words of freelance and two guest blog posts. I set up a corker of an opening for the next morning. But first, I have a birthday party to go to! I’m chuffed that I added 1500 words on a supposed day off; it just goes to show that once you get in the swing working at this pace, it’s hard not to write! Word count: 31,500

#1stdraftdiary Day 17: Day off! I need some creative so I treat the day like a holiday and let it lead me wherever it desires. A meander through film, books, poetry, and countryside lanes with a paddle in the sea. Word count: 31,500

#1stdraftdiary Day 18: Just half an hour in and I reach 31,900 words, before adding another 700 words in a short space of time. Write when you can! It builds up! Freelance load is heavy today also, so two fast but short dog walks keep me sane. Aiming at 2K words a day, I should be on 36K words and I end up reaching 32,600. BUT: some unexpected final tweaks to The Book of Shadows – Nine Lives Trilogy 2 arrive in my inbox – a plethora of small and fiddly details that need immediate attention. Word count: 32,600

(I decide to take a pause until July 3rd because as well as the urgent edits, I have a trip to Dublin for an Arts Council event on making applications in the Irish Writers Centre – it’s a 16 hour round trip & an overnight stay for a 1.5 hour session but MUCH NEEDED!)

#1stdraftdiary Day 19 (July 3^rd): I’m back to it this week before another little pause on the horizon. I’ve never written a 1st draft so disjointed before but you have to prioritize. Today: five freelance articles, 2 residency/bursary applications & 2 interviews so it’s late when I get started. I know it’s going to be almost pointless at this level of tiredness but I start at 32,700 and finishing at 33,500. That’s only 800 words but that was all I could manage today. Word count: 33,500

#1stdraftdiary Day 20: – hit the target of 2000 but it feels like filler and not really connected to what the story needs to be. Another cul-de-sac. Word count: 35,500

#1stdraftdiary Day 21: (July 5^th) 1000 words. It’s usually frustrating when you don’t get many words done, but today I’m super happy as I actually thought at one point that I’d get zero done! This is the final day before I take another, longer break – I have to go on a visit to the UK to say farewell to my sister who is moving to Australia for good, and I have a massive freelance project I have to finish first otherwise I won’t get paid. When I return I’m interviewing Carol Drinkwater at West Cork Literary Festival the next day, before doing three events of my own, and so the 1^st draft will have to wait until it can have the time and respect it deserves. And so, I pause on 36.5K until July 21st. Word count: 36,500

Conclusion: This has been the most disjointed first draft ever – I have never had to stop and start like this before – but when you are juggling, prioritization is necessary and I just have to live with it. Events need just as much preparation and focus, so Im prioritizing chronologically. Am I worried? Unsettled perhaps, but then, isn’t that always the way?

It seems the result is the same – I’m writing myself into a lot of cul-de-sacs so when I step away I can see where I’m not to go. The only difference is, this time, I’m not getting that buzz, that intensity that I love, because of all the gaps. This doesn’t feel great on an emotional level, but the important thing is: it’s moving forward. The process is still working it just feels different. So long as the manuscript is the best that it can be by the time I deliver it on October 31^st to my publishers, all is well. By then, these weird feelings will be forgotten about anyway, so time to turn off that inner critic (she’s particularly rampant right now).

I will start again on July 21st with a view to get my draft finished by the end of the month – that gives me exactly 9 days (the right number of days to have completed this draft in my usual 30 day timeframe) to write 20-24K words (it will come to a natural halt – or at least, it usually does). Wish me luck! I’m going to need it. But in the meantime, I’ll be cheering everyone else on with their #1stdraftdiary. Come and join me?